How To Achieve More Success – By Giving Up!

A question I am frequently asked – and I have written about this subject before – is, “How can I be more successful?”

Well there are traits which all successful people have, and I believe that if you study what others do, that you WANT to do, then you can shortcut your progress towards any goal.

It’s a bit like learning to play golf. If you want to be really good a golf, really quickly, then you need to practice a lot, you need to get a coach, and you need to copy the most successful golfers I the world, and NOT take on the tips from your mate who plays off a 20 handicap!!

So, what are the things that successful people have in common. Well, there are many things successful people DO which I would encourage you to emulate – for example – they DO spend time working on themselves and their business, rather than doing all the leg work themselves.

What is, perhaps, more interesting, is the things they DON’T do. So, here are the things that successful people don’t do, and that you might be doing. If you are then you need to give them up now!

Stop doing these 5 things and watch as your life changes.

Stop focusing on the short term.

Successful people know that patience is a virtue and that everything worthwhile takes time. They have their eye on the long term. Very few entrepreneurs start a business and are an ‘overnight’ success. It has usually taken years of work in the background to get there.

They know that their daily habits will create the life they want. That incremental changes, consistently made, is the way forward. So, stop focusing on the short term.

Give up the need to be externally validated.

What do I mean by that? Well most people need other people to give them permission to act, or to agree with them to make them feel good about their decisions. Especially – difficult decisions.

Why is that? Well, it is because they fear being judged, or rejected, or disapproved of. It’s natural. We grow up wanting the approval of our parents. By doing what our parents want we get love, and approval. And that’s fine, when you are a child. The problem is that many people stay in this mode and need approval from others before they can do anything. Especially if it is outside the ‘norm’.

If the ‘norm’ for your circle of influence is ‘get a job and do it till you retire’ and you want to run a business, then you risk the disapproval of others. And so many people never live the life they secretly desire. Many don’t even talk about it, it remains an unspoken dream inside them.

Successful people do what they know to be right – whether it’s popular or not. They know that when things change or when new ideas are talked about, there is often disapproval and resistance to change. They accept that and they do it anyway.

To be successful you MUST give up the need for approval from others, and trust yourself.

The third point is critical and it is – give up excuses and blame. 

Blame is a pointless exercise. All it does is potentially make someone else feel bad and even if it makes you feel temporarily NOT as bad, long term it doesn’t solve it. It makes you powerless because if it was someone else’s fault then you can’t solve it. And if you can’t solve it then you can’t change the outcome and you are a victim of life’s circumstances, not the master of your own.

The hallmark of a true leader is to understand that nothing is failure, everything is feedback. It took Edison 1000 attempts to create the lightbulb. Imagine if he accepted failure? Imagine if he blamed someone else for it not working? Instead he looked for the reason for the result and tried again. He looked for the things he could change, rather than focusing on the things he couldn’t.

Stop Playing Safe

Successful people don’t do ‘playing safe’. That doesn’t mean they take unnecessary risk, but they do take risks. They weigh up the risks and believe that for big change to happen, something has to change, something has to be done that is ‘not the norm’.

They are motivated by change, adventure, excitement, challenge and making a contribution. They are the early adopters and they generally go all in. They don’t ‘toe dip’.

Established wisdom will tell you – if something is worth doing it’s worth doing well. I disagree. Leaders know that if something is worth doing – it is worth doing badly. You have to be unafraid to make mistakes, get things wrong in order to get things very right.

Give Up Saying Yes To Everything

If your life is at the beck and call of others, if you find yourself with too much to do and feeling resentful, or if you never seem to have time for yourself, you are probably saying yes far too much.

Everyone knows that TIME is the only commodity no-one can buy more of. It is precious, and where most people know this, they don’t implement any strategies around it. They react to life and say yes to every opportunity, every request for help, every call on their time. They give it away.

The most successful people guard their time with ferocity. They put into their diary all the important things – family, kids holidays, personal time. And they won’t allow their time to be wasted. They will cut short unproductive meetings, and cut off people who are rambling around the point.

They have no issue with turning down opportunities that are not for them, and not telling white lies about the reasons why. They have the balance in their lives that they want. And that is possible to have – with the right focus, mindset and skillset.

At my critically acclaimed Power To Achieve even, people from all walks of life discover how to break free from the shackles of a conventional life, find their inner power and create the lives they are truly capable of living.

It’s not for the feint hearted, I pull no punches. But from the thousands of comments on Facebook from people who have attended, it’s clear my methods work.

So, if you are looking to break free from the same old same old and reach your personal and professional potential, if you know it is time for things to change for you, and if you are determined to make this your best year yet then keep a look out for our next Power To Achieve Event here?

It might just be the best thing you do this year!

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